Faint
by theadoptedbrewster
Summary: AU: Prentiss declines Clyde's offer and ends up adopting Declan a while later. Focuses on Hotch/Prentiss, who haven't spoken in over a year and Declan/OC. Rating subject to change.
1. Chapter 1

She was looking for something, desperately searching the darkened apartment room by room. She was alone, darkness lurking behind every corner. She couldn't see anything that wasn't in the direct path of her flashlight. Her breathing was labored and her heart was thumping loudly in her ears, her footsteps echoing as her boots hit the hardwood. She didn't know what she was looking for but she was scared of what she might find.

She threw another door open, her gun raised as she cleared the room. She tried the light switch and flicked it upwards, only met with a small click and a resounding shudder of thunder. The power was out.

Her eyes followed her flashlight that was temporarily chasing away the shadows of the room. She swallowed hard as she saw something reflect off the nightstand. She walked over, picking up the picture frame and running her finger over the embossed metal before she put a hand to her mouth, realizing exactly where she was. She was in her old apartment.

She spun on her heel, picture still in her hand before the lights flickered back on. Her eyes quickly adjusted and she continued to stare at the picture in her hands. It didn't make sense for it to be here, since it was taken after she moved out of this place.

Her head snapped up at the sound of heavy feet running up the stairs. She immediately raised her gun, pointing it towards the door, preparing for an oncoming attack. The door pushed open slowly as her finger rested over the trigger. Sweat was forming at her brow, her hand steady before she saw who it was.

A breath of relief left her as she lowered her gun.

"Dec?" She breathed out, both happy and confused that he was there.

"Mom, you have to go. You have to get out of here." Declan said, grabbing her shoulders. It was then Emily noticed the sound of footsteps growing closer. "Go!" Declan yelled, his eyes wide with panic before the door nearly flew off its hinges when a heavy boot slammed against it.

Emily immediately tried to get in front of Declan, frantically trying to aim her gun. She had to protect Declan, it was a job she's intrusted herself with since he was four. She didn't even register what had happened, it happened so fast. Declan nearly pushed her down, shielding her as the thunder of a gun blasted through her ears. Declan was practically hugging her, her gun dropping to the ground as she felt something spreading against her chest.

"Dec?" She whispered, before she realized what was soaking into her. It was warm and she dared not look down before Declan fell to the ground before her.

"Declan!" She screamed just before her eyes snapped open. She was on the couch in her living room, in the house where her and Declan lived together. She took a few deep breaths, noticing the coffee that was split down the front of her blouse. She let out a few choice curses before getting up and putting the coffee mug down on her glass coffee table, not worrying about not using a coaster as she headed upstairs to change. Once she cleaned off and changed her shirt she grabbed her phone and tapped her foot as she let it ring.

"Mom?" Declan had a certain tone of annoyance in his voice but it didn't matter as Emily let out the breath she didn't even realize she was holding.

"Just calling to check on you" Emily said, knowing that she should stop being so paranoid.

"Mom, I told you only to call if it was an emergency." Declan whined.

"I know, I know, I' m sorry. I just…" She didn't want to worry him. "I'll let you get back to your date." She said, smiling.

"Okay, I'll see you in a few hours." Declan said, and she could see him smiling at her overprotectiveness like he always did.

"Okay," She replied. "I love you." She said right after he'd already ended the call. She ran her fingers through her long mess of curly hair before she found herself dialling another number and walking downstairs to make herself another coffee.

"Hello?" A very familiar voice answered.

"Hey Jayje" She answered happily, smiling as she turned on her coffee maker that she'd had for a little too long.

"Emily!" The woman answered excitedly. "How've you been?"

"I'm good, sorry for not calling much lately." Emily said, impatiently waiting for her caffeine fix.

"It's fine, Em." Jennifer said, always assuring her that she'd done nothing wrong. "How's Declan doing?" Emily sighed a little louder than she intended to.

"That bad?" JJ asked, and Emily rolled her eyes. She really needed a new 'tell', as Hotch had once called it. She nearly frowned at that memory before she shook her head.

"He's been hanging out with his girlfriend a lot." Emily stated truthfully, pouring her hot coffee into the ceramic mug that Declan had gotten her for mother's day. You'd think he'd get your typical "Best Mom" mug or something like that but no, he'd gotten her a mug that read, "Nerd? I prefer the term 'intellectual badass.'"

"Teenage boys do that." Jennifer said, obviously knowing Declan's girlfriend was not what she wanted to talk about. She knew her better than that.

"I don't think it's fair," Emily said, sipping at her steamy cup of coffee.

"What? Declan hanging out with his girlfriend? Didn't you say you liked her?" JJ questioned.

"I do like her; she's a sweet girl, and I'm not talking about that." Emily paused as she put her mug back down on the counter. "I'm talking about how you were a mom first and I still have to deal with the teenage years before you." JJ couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Well, now you can help _me _out when Henry reaches that age." JJ said and Emily could just picture the look on her face.

"I had a nightmare today." Emily blurted, not noticing how tight her hands were gripping the island in her kitchen.

"Was it about Doyle?" JJ asked, her tone not hiding any of the worry that she had for her best friend.

"No, no, I haven't dreamt about him since I left the BAU." She confessed, picking at her nearly non-existent nails. "This one scared me though." She said, as if surprised that a nightmare had managed scare her.

"Do you want to tell me about it?"

"No, it's okay. Just telling you that much makes me feel a little better." Emily smiled a little bit before changing the subject. "How are Henry and Will?"

"You should come see for yourself sometime soon." JJ said, raising an eyebrow. Emily let out a little laugh.

"How about tomorrow night? Supper at 6?" Emily suggested, excited to see her best friend and her family.

"That sounds fantastic." JJ agreed, happy to hang out. It seemed like forever. "Oh, maybe I could invite the rest of the team? Hotch has been asking about you, saying you haven't been returning his calls…"

"Jayje…" Emily coaxed, all the amusement gone from her voice at the very thought of Aaron Hotchner.


	2. Chapter 2

_After she'd quit the BAU he'd really tried to stay in touch with her, tried to make sure she was okay. She started coming over whenever their work schedules didn't collide. Since she'd left the BAU, she hadn't quit the bureau but was reassigned to a job that got her home at 5 and still made use of her skillset. She was still helping people, Hotch had once told her; it was just cleaner. And safer._

_A few months after Emily quit the BAU she'd adopted Declan. His father suggested it since he was away frequently and Louise was no longer there to look after him. Also he could sense that Declan needed some sort of change. Things just hadn't gone back to normal after Doyle died and he didn't know how to deal with it. So she'd agreed. _

_One night, nearly a year after she'd quit the BAU, she was over at Hotch's apartment for supper. It was a usual thing for them. Beth was at work and had not been here the last few times Emily and Declan had come over. After supper, Hotch offered to clean up the dishes and she insisted on helping while Declan went to go play with Jack. They washed in silence, working out a simple system between washing and drying before Hotch's phone rang. He wiped off his hands with the dishcloth before answering._

_"Hotchner." He replied professionally, making Emily smile as she glanced over at Declan and Jack playing a board game on the coffee table. Emily glanced over at Hotch, who had walked just out of earshot as she finished up with the dishes. His face was serious as he spoke to whoever was on the other line. After the call was seemingly over Hotch walked into the living room, where she'd moved after she was done with the dishes. _

_"Was that work?" Emily asked casually as Jack took his turn. _

_"No." Was all he replied, his face still holding a certain undertone that she'd heard all too often over their years of hunting monsters together. "Jack, it's time to get ready for bed." Hotch said and Jack pouted. _

_"But I'm beating Dec, daddy!" He announced. _

_"I know, but I think Emily and Declan should be getting home and you have school tomorrow." Hotch argued; Jack made no further argument but pouted before hugged both Emily and Declan tightly and said goodnight before heading upstairs. Emily stood up from the couch, unsure of what caused Hotch's sudden change in attitude. _

_"Thanks for coming over." Hotch said, his eyes meeting hers, something unspoken between them. _

_"It was my pleasure, Hotch." She said, convinced she'd done something wrong before she grabbed Declan's hand and headed out to the car. _


	3. Chapter 3

"Emily?" Jennifer asked, as her friend had fallen quiet. "I won't if you don't want me too..." She added.

"No, no, it's fine. You can invite them." She realized her coffee had gone cold. "Beth and Kevin too." JJ grew silent.

"Emily…" JJ started.

"What?"

"Hotch and Beth broke up… almost a year ago. Has it really been that long since you've spoken to him?"

Emily bit her cheek; hard. She'd never wanted Hotch to break off with Beth. She was sweet and beautiful and made Hotch smile. She was perfect for him, why would they have broken up?

"Yeah, I guess it has." Emily said, putting a hand to her forehead. Emily now regretted never answering Hotch's calls. He didn't call her often, but every time she'd just hit ignore. Declan saw her do it once and asked why she didn't want to talk to him. She'd dodged the question and instantly felt bad for shutting Declan out like that. She was sure he missed Hotch and Jack as much as she did.

"Is there something I should know?" JJ asked, still worrying.

"No, it's just… They were so good for each other, you know?" Emily let out a sigh.

"Yeah, Beth had a job offer on the other side of the country. We tried to convince him to go with her, that Derek could have taken care of the unit, but he didn't listen. He let her leave; Jack was pretty broken up about it." Emily's eyes filled with tears at the thought of Jack having to say goodbye to Beth. Another woman who had left him… Just like she had.

"Hey JJ, do you mind if I invite Hotch myself?" Emily asked, unsure of what she was signing up for.

"Sure, Em. I'll talk to you later?"

"Of course." Emily smiled. "Bye, JJ."

"Bye" JJ replied before Emily hung up and walked over to the living room so that she could sink into the couch, her phone still clutched in her right hand. She took in a few deep breaths, not moving for apparently longer than she thought because she soon heard the door swing open.

"Declan?" She called, not turning her head.

"Nope, serial killer." Declan mused as she turned her head.

"That's not funny." She told him, hiding a smile.

"It's a little funny." Declan countered, looking through the cupboards.

"Did you have supper?" He asked, and she glanced at the clock, noticing that he was home before his curfew. She was surprised he was home so early before she told him that she hadn't had supper.

"Pancakes?" He asked, eyeing the pancake mix.

"At 8 o'clock?"

"Emergency cheering up pancakes can be had at any time." Declan declared, pulling a mixing bowl out of the cupboard.

"What makes you think I need cheering up?" Emily asked, getting up to join him in the kitchen.

"The last time you didn't have supper was when you spent the day looking at those pictures my dad gave you." Declan turned to flash a small smile towards her as he began making her pancakes. The corners of Emily's lips were being pulled up at the memory.

Declan's father was in town and they had all gone out to dinner one night. He'd given her a box of pictures of Declan growing up because she'd wanted to see them. She spent hours flipping through them and got Declan to tell her stories behind almost every one of them. They'd started from the most recent, a picture of Declan smiling next to his prize winning science project, Declan playing lacrosse, Declan smiling with his friends. Emily was smiling and laughing and they'd been having a good time before they'd gotten near the end. Emily noted a small, envelope that had Tom Cohler scrawled across the front in her own hand writing. She'd nearly forgotten that'd she'd given this to him. She pulled the small stack on photos out and her breath caught in her throat once she laid eyes on the first one.

Declan didn't even see the picture before Emily was covering her mouth with her hand, her eyes filled with tears. She hadn't even known this picture existed. Declan must have been four when it was taken. They both weren't looking at the camera as Declan was too busy playing with the golden ring hanging around her neck. Emily didn't even notice she was crying before the memory unfolded behind her eyelids.

_It was quiet day in the Tuscan villa and "Lauren" was sitting on the couch, Declan sitting in her lap as he fingered the sparkling chain that carried her promise to marry Ian Doyle. She was smiling at him before she remembered hearing the click of a camera. She'd looked up and remembered Ian holding a professional camera with a big red bow on it._

_"Happy birthday, my love." She remembered him saying, leaning in to kiss her before ruffling Declan's hair and handing her the camera. That was just a week before he was arrested. _

"Mom?"

Emily snapped back into present time, just as Declan pushed a plate of pancakes in front of her.

"Whoa, enough syrup, kiddo? Who taught you how to make pancakes anyway?" Emily quipped.

"I don't know, some woman." She glared at him as he dug into his own stack of pancakes.

"So, how was your date?" Emily said with her mouth full. Declan resisted the urge to laugh at her before he answered.

"It was good, how was your day?" It took a lot of self-control to not let out her tell-tale sigh.

"It was fine." She said calmly before adding, "JJ invited us over for dinner."

"That's good, I miss her." Declan smiled at her, but she could tell that there was something else he wanted to say.

"The rest of the team's coming too." She said, putting down her fork to watch for his reaction.

"Oh yeah." He said simply, stuffing more pancakes in his mouth before he dropped his fork. "I'm going up to do my homework. Holler if you need anything." He said, heading upstairs and leaving her to clean up the dishes, something she didn't mind doing. She liked keeping her hands busy; she liked distraction.

* * *

After the kitchen was cleaner then she'd ever seen it she finally just cursed and dialled Aaron Hotchner's number from memory. She leaned up against the counter as it rang, wondering if he'd even answer.

"Hello?" She smiled brightly.

"Hi Jack," She greeted, only to be met with silence.

"Who's this?" The now 10 year old boy asked.

"It's Emily." She said; her mood dampened as she bit her lip.

"Emily!" Jack exclaimed excitedly.

"Yeah," She answered, fighting back a smile. Unfortunately, she didn't call to catch up with Jack.

"Is your dad there, sweetie?" She asked.

"Yup, hold on," The boy said and she could hear him call out for his father.

"Hello?" Hotch answered and her breath caught in her throat for a second.

"Hi," She breathed.

"Who is this?"

"Emily," She replied quickly. There was a short pause.

"Emily Prentiss?" He sounded shocked; astounded that she would call him.

"The one and only," She replied, trying to force herself to smile.

"Um," He started. "Why the call?" She didn't blame him for asking for her motive as she let out a sigh.

"Declan and I are heading over to JJ's tomorrow night and I wanted to know if you and Jack wanted to come?" She was met with silence on the other end. "The whole team's gonna be there." She added, suddenly desperately wanting him there, if for no other reason that she wanted to see how much Jack's grown.

"I'll think about it." He nearly whispered before hanging up. Emily's mouth nearly fell open before she huffed and headed upstairs. She stopped by Declan's room and he was curled up in his desk chair, reading one of her favorite books.

"Don't stay up too late." Emily warned, knowing that he'd finished with his homework. Declan was just that kind of kid. "I love you."

"I love you too." He called back, barely looking up from his book. She shook her head and closed the door and headed to her own room. She quickly stripped down to throw on an old baggy shirt and a pair of shorts before she turned off the light and crawled into bed. Sergio curled up at her feet and she quietly hoped that she wouldn't have another nightmare.


	4. Chapter 4

When Declan ventured downstairs he assumed he was up before his mom. He poured himself some orange juice before he heard a sound he didn't quite recognize coming from the closed basement door. He opened it, calling down to his mother. She showed her face, her cheeks rosy and her workout clothes on.

"You're working out?" Declan asked.

"Yup,"

"At 7am? On a day off?" He continued to question before she started to slam around their hanging punching bag.

"Actually I've been doing this all night." She muttered through her punches.

"You didn't sleep?" He asked, walking down the stairs before yawning.

"Speaking of sleeping, why are you up at 7am?" She said, stopping the bag from swinging with one gloved hand.

"Why are you up at 7am?"

"Told you, couldn't sleep," She replied simply. But that wasn't it. She could sleep, she was just scared to. Declan grabbed her by the arm.

"Come on, you need some sleep." Declan told her, his eyes pleading. Emily sighed, complaining that she was the adult and that he shouldn't be sending her to bed before she'd reached the bedroom, passing out as soon as her head hit the pillow. Declan realized just how tired he was as she pulled the blanket over her before he yawned loudly and fell asleep next to her.

"Emily!" JJ exclaimed, hugging the brunette tightly. "Hey, Declan." She greeted when she finally let go of her best friend.

"Hey, aunt JJ" Declan said before the petite woman threw her arms around him. "Will you ever stop growing?" Jennifer joked, making a face at the boy who was now taller than her.

"Are we the first ones here?" Declan asked.

"Nope, almost everyone is already here." JJ explained, smiling as they heading out to the patio where Will was cooking on the barbeque. Emily scanned the faces of her former team mates, noting which one wasn't there almost immediately. Emily tugged on JJ's sleeve and the blonde tilted her head towards her.

"No Hotch?" Emily whispered with a twinge of disappointment unhidden in her voice.

"I don't know I wasn't the one who talked to him." JJ said while giving her friend a look.

"He didn't call me back." Emily muttered before walking over to greet and hug everyone. Emily pulled out a bottle of red wine from the bag she'd brought and poured herself a glass. Her and Declan both sat down. They all began talking as Will continued to cook. Henry sat in Declan's lap even though JJ said that she could get him his own chair. Declan didn't seem to mind as he showed Henry how to play a game on his iPhone.

When Will was done cooking they all filed into the living room to eat, since the dining room table only sat four. Emily had just taken the first bite out of her hamburger when there was a knock at the door. Since Emily was in the chair closest to the door she offered to get it, putting her hamburger down on the coffee table. She didn't even look to see who it was before she found herself swinging the door open.

"Emmy!" Jack said excitedly, nearly knocking the wind out of Emily as he went to hug her.

"Hey little man" Emily said, running her hand through his sandy blonde hair and smiling at him before she glanced up at his father. He opened his mouth to say something but quickly closed it. She'd never seen Aaron Hotchner at a loss for words. She grabbed Jack's hand and headed into the living room, not speaking a word to Hotch as she went in the kitchen to grab Jack a hot dog with ketchup. She was just going to grab Jack something to drink when she felt someone behind her.

"Hotch, you scared me." She said, as she pulled a cup down from the cupboard.

"Prentiss, can we talk?"

"Prentiss? What happened to Emily?" She nearly scoffed as she poured Jack's drink, not turning to look at him.

"Emily, I-" Emily grabbed the drink off the counter to walk over and stand in front of him.

"Not here." She quickly said before walking back into the living room to join her friends.

"Thanks for coming, Em. Maybe me and you could go to lunch soon and-" His eyes darted over to Hotch, who was picking up a very tired Jack. "Talk about things." She added with a smile before Emily hugged the blonde tightly for a little longer than she usually did.

"Thanks for having us, JJ" Emily heard Hotch say just as Emily separated from JJ.

"Bye, Jayje. Bye, Emmy." Jack said before yawning, his head falling on Hotch's shoulder. Hotch readjusted himself. Jack was getting almost too big to carry and Hotch wasn't as young as he once was.

Once the door was shut behind them, Hotch grabbed Emily's arm. She stopped to turn to him, sighing before she asked Declan to meet her in the car.

"Hey," Hotch said as Emily crossed her arms across her chest.

"What is it, Hotch?" Emily asked; her foot tapping. She was ready to run as fast as she could to her car and he knew it.

"I was thinking we could meet at your place sometime and talk?" Hotch asked. Emily kept silent, her mouth forming a thin line. "I don't get why you're so mad at me." Hotch spat, making Emily's eyebrows furrow as she looked up at him.

"This is not the time or place, Aaron" Emily said, her voice a harsh whisper before she headed back to her car.

"Emily!" Hotch nearly yelled before he remembered the sleeping boy in his arms, he grabbed her shoulder before she turned and brushed his hand off. "Are you okay to drive?"

"I'm fine, I only had two glasses." She told him, Hotch gave her a look. They locked eyes and starred at each other for a long moment before Emily practically stormed back to her car and slammed the door.

"You okay?" Declan asked as she let out a huff and started the engine.

"I'm fine." She said before she drove them home. Not a word was spoken during the drive home and once Emily got into the house she poured herself another glass of wine.

"Goodnight, mom" Declan said, his blue eyes worried before he headed up to his room. Emily sat on the couch, not bothering to turn the TV on as she sipped at her wine. She was thinking of all the things that she could have changed, including answering Hotch's calls. She nearly jumped when Sergio jumped up next to her on the couch and she stroked him as he purred and rubbed against her side.

"Why can't all men be like you?" She asked her small black companion, before she flicked off the lights and headed upstairs. She didn't have nightmares earlier that day so she was surprised just hours later when she shot out of bed in a cold sweat. She kicked the blankets off of her and went to wash her face before she walked down the hall to check on Declan. He was sound asleep and she went in to turn off the book reading light on his headboard and to put the book that had fallen to his chest on the night stand.

"Lauren?" She jumped as Ian's tired Irish drawl nearly echoed through the silent house. She put a finger to her lips before pointed at the sleeping four year old. He walked over to her to wrap his arms around her waist. "Why are you up so late, love?" He said, running a hand up her bare arm. "You're freezing." He noted, pulling her a little closer.

"I couldn't sleep." She answered truthfully, brushing a hand through her hair. She shimmed out of Ian's grasp just so she could push some of Declan's curls behind his ear. He was so peaceful, so innocent, she noted before starring up at the man who wanted her raise him as a warrior. Somehow it didn't matter that she was tangled up in this lie, she knew the one thing that was true in her heart was how much she adored and loved this little boy.

"Mom?" Declan mumbled, his eyes fluttering open before he sat himself upright.

"Go back to sleep sweetie, I was just leaving." She told him, giving him a small smile.

"Why are you up so late?" Declan asked.

"Don't worry about it, mon chere." She said, kissing his forehead before heading out and closing the door behind her. It was times like this when she wondered if it was a good idea to take him in. The piercing blue eyes were not the only quality that was passed to the young boy. He was stubborn and protective and loved her more than anyone. She ran both her hands through her tousled mess of hair as she let out a loud sigh before Sergio brushed up against her leg. She reached down to pick him up before she headed back up to her room to try and sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

She did sleep for a little bit but once the sun was spilling in and alighting her room, she knew that it was unlikely for her to go back to sleep. Her entire body felt heavy as she practically dragged herself out of bed. She was desperate for a coffee, hoping that it would wake her up a bit. She popped an Advil to help with the slight headache her wine drinking had caused. She hadn't drank much of anything lately, her tolerance was way down. She'd have to work on that.

It looked to be pretty nice out as she headed downstairs to get her coffee. She was tempted to close the blinds as she held up her hand to block out the sun. She decided she'd let Declan sleep in a bit as she sat down to continue the book she'd been trying to finish for weeks. She let out an exasperated sigh when her phone rang. She closed and her book and reached to answer it.

"Emily?" Emily sighed again; it was much too early for this.

"What do you want, Aaron?" Emily probably sounded a little more agitated than she'd meant but she'd really wanted to finish her book.

"I just want to talk." Hotch was resisting all urges to become angry with her because he wasn't really angry with her. He was confused about her and where she stood and what was going on inside her head. Emily thought for a minute before replying.

"You and Jack could come over for dinner if you wanted."

"I'd like that. Jack missed you and Declan a lot, you know." Emily knew that Hotch was trying to get her to talk but when she was ready to talk; she'd do it face to face.

"I know," She nearly whispered. "I'll see you both at 6." She quickly added before hanging up. She didn't want him to try and corner her through the phone. She finally got to finish her book before Declan made his way down the steps.

"Hey, so Hotch and Jack are coming over for dinner." She practically blurted, heading into the kitchen to start breakfast.

"Oh?" Declan said, getting something to drink.

"Don't sound too excited." Emily laughed. "I was thinking Sonja could come over too?" She asked, pulling cereal out of the cupboard and putting it down on the counter. Declan handed her two bowls, apparently not minding that she wanted some of his more sugary cereal.

"I'll ask her," Declan said, taking his bowl of cereal into the living room. "So, what changed your mind?"

"Hmm?" Emily said, plopping down on the other side of the couch.

"I didn't think you'd be inviting Hotch over is all." Declan said, shrugging.

"Well, I missed Jack. Didn't you?" She said, smiling before she headed upstairs to get dressed and showered. Declan watched her leave with sad eyes, forever wondering what was really going on inside her head. They'd had talks before. When he'd first moved in she'd even wanted to get him a therapist but he respectively declined her offer. He'd been through his fair share and although he didn't know everything, he knew she'd been through a lot more. She wanted a child and she was lonely. He had just lost his only mother figure and his father's work kept him from helping him through it. School was even becoming increasingly difficult with all the rumours swirling around. He was excited to move to a new school, a new house, he needed a fresh start. He was quick to adjust, especially with Emily's constant need to assure that he was okay. She'd bought him a piano as a welcome present and loved when he played for her. He offered to bike to get groceries and was a genuine good kid. And she was good mom.

* * *

"Sonja, sweetie, can you get that?" Emily asked, continuing to prepare dinner for the five of them. Sonja had come over earlier to help and Emily, Declan and her had been in the kitchen ever since. Emily was noticed that Sonja kept pulling at her long sleeves to keep them down and became curious. Sonja had her long, light brown hair up in a bun so that she could help cook and she was genuinely happy to help.

"Hey," Emily greeted before Jack walked around the island to hug the aproned Emily. "Hey kiddo," She laughed, before smiling up at Hotch. "Oh, this is Sonja, Declan's girlfriend." Emily said, gesturing to the girl. Hotch shook her hand with a smile and Sonja was quick to get back to finishing up with the cooking but Emily told her she could handle it and to go hang out with Declan in the living room. Emily gave her a smile and she was quick to agree.

"Supper's ready!" She declared, setting out a pile of plates so that everyone could get however much they wanted. Hotch and Emily took their seats on the couch and let Jack, Sonja and Dec sit at the dining room table so that they could have some privacy.

"It's getting pretty stormy." Emily noted, taking a bite of her chicken.

"Hopefully it will clear up." Hotch said, his face as stoic as ever.

"Well, if it doesn't, you guys could, um, stay here, if you wanted." Emily stammered, looking up at him. He smiled a bit.

"Yeah, I wouldn't want to risk anything happening. Are you offering that invite to Sonja too?" Hotch asked.

"Of course, I love the girl." Emily smiled. Emily really did care for her; she was over here so much it was like having another child really.

"That's good." Hotch said, glancing over at her nearly empty plate. "That you like her." He added, just watching her for a long moment. It was then that the house was plunged into darkness and Emily squeaked. She immediately stood up and made her way to the kitchen, not without walking into the island, unfortunately. She took out a lantern, flicking it on and putting it on the counter, lighting up most of the place. They all moved into the living room with the lantern and it was decided that everyone would be staying the night. They ended up pulling out board games, hoping the power would come back on. Declan suggested they make a fort and they did, pulling down all the blankets and pillows except for the ones on Emily's bed. Unfortunately, Hotch and Emily were not able to fit into the finished product but told the three that they could sleep in there if they wanted. All three were pretty excited and Hotch and Emily said goodnight and headed upstairs.

"You can have the bed, I have an air mattress-"

"Emily, I'm not going to kick you out of your bed. I'll take the mattress." He smiled before she was putting the lantern on the table and pulling the not inflated mattress out of her closet before realizing that the pump to blow it up needed power. She laughed at herself before gesturing towards her bed.

"I trust you." Emily smiled, climbing under the covers. Hotch hesitated only a moment before climbing under the covers on the other side. There was enough space on the bed so that they weren't right up against each other or anything but she was close enough. He could smell her shampoo as they both faced each other.

"How have you been?" Hotch asked, suddenly changing the air around them to serious.

"I'm okay." She said, trying her hardest to keep her mask up.

"No, you're not." Her eyes widened a bit.

"The nightmares are back, but they're different." She whispered between them.

"How so?" He asked.

"I never see his face."

"Doyle's?"

"I think so, but I'm not sure. It's always too dark." She said, furrowing her eyebrows.

"It's okay. They'll go away, they did before, right?"

"Right." She said, right before yawning.

"Go to sleep, Emily. We can talk in the morning." Hotch said before they both said goodnight.

* * *

"Emily?" Hotch said after hearing her jolt upright. She was almost completely still as sweat shone off her face, her eyes wide and panicked as she let out a few ragged breaths. "Emily," He repeated soothingly, reaching out to put his hand on top of hers. She immediately turned her head to look at him, surprised to see him. "Try and slow your breathing." Hotch said softly, although he still managed to make it sound like an order. She steadied her breathing and fell against her pillows, her eyes staring up at the ceiling.

"Are you okay?" He asked, knowing she wasn't.

"I will be." She replied slowly, and he decided to just leave her be. He still stayed awake for a while, just hoping that she would fall back asleep. She didn't.


	6. Chapter 6

A few months had passed since that stormy night. Hotch and Emily weren't as dismissive with each other and had taken a few steps forward in their relationship. Emily was still unsure, expecting him to pick up and leave at any moment, but as time went on her fears were pushed to the back of her restless mind. Everything continued as normal, she even went out with JJ and Penelope for a girl's night. Hotch even looked after Declan and Jack. Sonja still remained a nearly permanent fixture in the Prentiss household; not that Emily minded, but she was simply curious about the girl. She prayed that none of the things she was coming up with in her head were true, but she couldn't help but ask.

"Why haven't I ever met Sonja's dad?" Emily asked Declan one day just as he was writing down notes in the living room. Emily knew that Sonja's mother had passed a few years back but she'd still never seen her father and Declan had never been over to their house, only to drop Sonja off after school; since they both walked home.

"Oh, um," Declan stammered and Emily crossed her arms, giving him a look that practically demanded for him to tell her the truth. "I don't know, you never asked." He said, looking up at her.

"I'm asking now." She remarked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sonja wouldn't want me to talk about it," He mumbled under his breath before he grabbed his things and hurried passed her and headed upstairs. She heard the door slam and immediately became more worried than she was before. She didn't bring Sonja's family up again.

Their relationship had returned to normal but she knew that he was hiding something from her. She was determined to find out what, but didn't push him. She bit her lip, was she causing more damage by waiting him out? Her thoughts were cut off when Declan stopped playing the piano; due to a knock at the door. Emily got up to get it, letting Hotch in. Declan checked his phone before standing up.

"Rick's here so I'm gonna go." Declan said, giving Emily a quick hug and giving Hotch a smile before he grabbed his overnight bag and headed out to meet his friend. Emily looked out the window, watching him get into Rick's mom's truck. He glanced back, knowing that she'd be watching. It was like she was convinced that he couldn't walk across their front lawn without something bad happening. She turned back once the truck had driven off, only to find that Hotch had come up behind her. She nearly jumped, laughing in spite of herself as she offered him a drink. He agreed to wine and she handed him a glass and sat down next to him on the couch.

"He's talented." Hotch commented, nodding towards the piano. Emily pushed a strand of her dark hair behind her ear.

"He really is." She said, smiling before taking a small sip of her glass.

"How are you?"

"I'm alright." She said, putting her drink down on her table before asking how he was.

"Glad to have a day off." He said; his eyes distant.

"What happened?" She asked, leaning towards him. He looked at her and let out a breath.

"He'd killed seven kids in Florida. When we'd got there he'd killed six." Hotch looked down towards his drink, swirling the red liquid around a bit. "A ten year old boy…" He muttered, disappointed in himself.

"Don't do that." She snapped, making him look up at him, his eyes questioning what he'd done wrong. "Don't blame yourself. You can't save everyone." She reached out to grab his hand. He took it and squeezed.

"It's not just that-"He started.

"He was the same age as Jack, I know that. But it wasn't Jack. Jack's fine. You're fine. That's all you can hope for." Emily said, circling her thumb on the back of his hand.

"And you." He whispered.

"What?" She asked.

"You're fine too." He said, pulling her into his side. She rested her head on his shoulder as he sipped at his wine. They sat like that for a while, just enjoying the sound of their combined breathing, the sound that continually reminded them that they were still alive.

Once he was done with his drink he glanced at the clock, letting out a sigh.

"It's getting late, I should go pick up Jack from Jessica's." He said, still unmoving. Emily was the first to get up, leading him over to the door.

"Goodnight, Emily." He said, putting on his coat before he met eyes with her, pushing a bit of her hair out of her face. Her skin was so soft, he noted while trailing his hand down until he was cupping her neck in his palm. She looked up at him before nodding, letting his lips come crashing down on hers. He kept one hand at the nape of her neck before he found himself pushing her up against the nearest wall.

He pulled away to look at her, watching the rise and fall of her chest as her eyes burned with a fire that threatened to consume him. He trailed butterfly kisses down towards her throat before his fingers began unbuttoning her blouse.

_Don't let him see._ Her mind screamed at her before she found herself dropping out of his grasp and to the floor, putting a hand to her now pounding head.

"Emily?" He asked, suddenly panicked as he knelt down in front of her.

"Get out," She breathed. She didn't want him close to her. _You can't let him see. _Her inner voice echoed again. "Get out!" She screamed, tears welling up in her eyes; he didn't move.

"Emily-"He said, reaching for her.

"_Get out!" _She screamed. He hesitated for a moment, but left. She sat there for a long moment, in silence. The only sound in the house the sound of her quick breaths. She pulled herself up; gripping the door handle to force herself to her feet.

She locked the door before running upstairs; stripping off her blouse is the process. She found herself standing in front of the mirror, trailing her fingers over the raised scars that had marred her skin. She could never escape them. She could cover them up, ignore them but it wouldn't change the facts. She would never escape what had happened to her.

_You're disgusting._ The voice in her head whispered. She was terrified to realize that it was her own voice. She took one last look in the mirror before she slammed her hand into it, gasping out at the pain as she watching the glass shatter and fall. She fell to her knees, glancing down at her blood covered hand. They were both shaking uncontrollably although it might have been her vision. She couldn't tell.

This was her first act of self-inflicted harm since she was a teenager and she didn't even realize until she'd already done it.

Suddenly she was just thinking about the mess. No one could see her like this.

She scrabbled away from the broken glass before heading to the bathroom, watching the blood swirl around the sink. It was extremely painful but she pulled out the bits of glass in her hands and bandaged them; one obviously much worse than the other. The blood was already seeping through when she walked back into her bedroom. She probably needed stitches she realized as she tried to apply pressure to the wound.

_"Emily!" Her mother's voice echoed. Emily froze immediately before she fumbled to take off the necklace that had just arrived in the mail from her father. A present for getting into Yale, the card had read. Thankfully one of her mother's employee's had brought it to her. She called her mother in while she adjusted her skirt. She put on her best fake smile as her mother swung the door open, carefully inspecting the room before turning her attention to her daughter. _

_"Well, you look nice." Elizabeth said, walking over to straighten her daughter's shirt and push her hair out of her face. Emily never knew whether or not her mother's words were sincere since she almost always followed it up with an adjustment to her clothing or hair. Some days all she wished for was a sibling so that all her mother's energy would not be wasted on her; and that every misdemeanor would not be treated as a capital offense. If only her mother knew the half of it. _

Emily took the mirror out of the house first, putting it out on the curb before she began to clean up the glass and vacuumed repeatedly afterwards. Once she was done with that she collapsed on to her bed and let Sergio into the room since she'd locked him out to avoid him cutting his paws. He jumped up into bed with her, snuggling into her side. She didn't sleep. She just stared at the ceiling, simply wondering how she could be so stupid- all well trying to ignore the throbbing in her hands.

The only distraction was when her phone rang out. She was hesitant to answer it at all before she realized that it might be Declan. She reached over to grab it; mumbling out a hello. She felt drained and it showed in her voice.

"Emily?" The voice answered. His worry was creeping through the phone as she let out a sigh. "Are you okay?" Hotch asked, his voice somehow soothing as she clutched on to the phone, closing her eyes tightly. No, she was not okay. She kept quiet on the other line, just breathing. "Emily?" He asked again. "Are you there?"

"Yeah, I'm here." She breathed. It's not like she could be mad at him. He hadn't done anything wrong; it was all her fault. He'd only tried to help after she'd stopped their tryst. And how had she repaid him? By kicking him out of her house, leaving her alone to… She stopped that thought before she let out another loud sigh.

"Please." She begged. "Just talk to me."

"Okay," He agreed before he just started rambling on about everything and nothing. She just liked hearing the sound of his voice. It was something to hold on to while the darkness threatened to take her completely. His voice was fighting back the dark as she soaked it in. It was almost like a shield as she breathed in and out; reminding herself that she was alive.

_You're fine too. _Hotch's words echoed in her head as she continued to speak to her. She thought of him and Declan, Jack and Sonja. Of all their laughing faces and smiles. There were people that needed her she realized. There was a young boy that usually slept right down the hall that needed her. She cursed herself, how could she have forgotten that simple fact?

Hotch's voice continued as she closed her eyes, finally letting sleep pull her under.


	7. Chapter 7

"Sonja," Declan asked, sitting up a little straighter and turning to look at her.

"Yeah?" She answered quickly.

"I was wondering about something," Declan said, biting the inside of his cheek. He looked the girl up and down, reaching over to lay his hand atop of hers.

"What is it?" She asked, noting the serious mood that seemed to encircle them.

"It's about your dad…." Declan trailed off, waiting for any sort of reaction.

"What about him?" Sonja snapped, her bright green eyes suddenly blazing as she pulled her hand out from under his. Normally Declan would have just dropped it but he just had to know. It had been bugging him ever since Mom had asked. He didn't know any more than she did, really. Just that Sonja hated her father and was never in the mood to talk about why.

"Why do you hate him so much?" Declan finally just spit the words out, immediately regretting them as Sonja stood up from the couch.

"Why does it matter?" She retorted with her arms crossed across her chest. Declan took a breath before he stood up as well.

"Okay, how about a trade?" Declan proposed, watching her eyes flick up towards him. "I tell you something about my father if you tell me something about yours." Declan continued to coax, reaching out to grab her hand, urging her to sit back down with him. She scoffed and sat back down, keeping a bit of distance between them. He didn't talk about his father much, not even to Emily who was the only person who would really understand.

"Go on," Sonja urged as he'd fallen silent. He realized he was staring down at his feet before he looked over at her. She gave him a closed mouth smile, which was something at least. He nodded at her, taking a breath.

"Well, I didn't know a lot about my father for a long time. When I was little he was just my dad. There wasn't any reason to question that. He was away sometimes, but I had a nanny. Her name was Louise." He stopped, thinking about his surrogate mother and what had happened to her. He shook the memories off. "It was just the three of us until Emily came along." Declan smiled. "I was only small when her and my dad were together. We were happy." He noted. Little did he know back then, right? "Then we had to leave and come to the states."

"You lived overseas?" Sonja asked curiously, inching a bit closer to him.

"Yeah, Italy, I think." Declan answered. "See, I was kept in the dark for a long time about my dad. I didn't know what he was until I was already being raised by someone else."

"What was he?"

"My dad was a terrorist." Declan said flatly, glancing over at Sonja for her reaction. She stayed still and quiet for a moment before she leaned over to kiss him gently.

"Are you afraid you're like him?" Sonja whispered between them, glancing up at his blue eyes before she had her answer. "Oh, Dec," She said, pulling away a bit. "Maybe you are like him." Declan furrowed his eyebrows, glancing over at her. "But not in a bad way. Maybe you have his sense of humour or something. Maybe he had those same beautiful eyes as you do." She smiled at him. He was quick to smile back before she kissed his nose, making him laugh.

"I love you." He said, still laughing a bit. An unreadable expression crossed Sonja's face. "What is it?" He asked, reaching for her before she was already standing up, not meeting his eyes.

"Sonja-"He started, realizing he'd said something wrong.

"Um, I should get going." She mumbled out before she grabbed her bag and headed out before he could say another word.

After that Declan sat down at piano but didn't play anything. Emily got from work just a little while later.

"I thought Sonja was staying for dinner?" Emily asked as she pulled off her coat to hang it up.

"She left." Declan said standing up. Already knowing what she was about to ask he told her he wasn't hungry and headed upstairs to stare at the ceiling. Emily let out a sigh before the phone rang.

"Hello?" She answered, leaning on the counter.

"Hello, Emily." The voice replied, making Emily stop short.

"Mother?" She asked, suddenly very confused.

"How have you been?"

"I'm alright." Emily answered; she didn't even think that her mother knew about Declan. Why would she? She only called once every few years. Emily was hoping she wouldn't ask to go out to lunch. She just wasn't up to it.

"I was wondering if you'd like to go to lunch with me." Apparently she expected too much from her mother. Emily wondered if she should take Declan with her. No, she wanted him to have some time to himself. Maybe then he'd tell her what happened with him and Sonja.

"Sure, when?" Her mother asked and Emily thought about it for a second before saying tomorrow afternoon. Her mother insisted on treating her to a fancy restaurant downtown. She took a few breaths once she'd hung up. She was confused about the invite; she didn't think her mother would call without a reason. She heated up a microwavable diner and went upstairs to finish up some work. Declan's door was closed and she didn't want to bother him.

Before she went to bed she did knock on the door to say goodnight.

"Come in," Declan said after a few minutes of silence. He was lying down on his bed, phone in hand.

"Hey," She greeted, sitting down on his desk chair. "Do you want to talk about it?" He glanced over at her before he put his phone down on the night stand.

"She's not messaging me back." Declan mumbled.

"What happened?"

"Nothing, she just took off."

"She would've had to have a reason for leaving." Emily pressed.

"I told her I loved her." He said, smiling a bit.

"And then she took off?" Sounded like something a younger Emily would do.

"You know, maybe we can talk about it after you tell me what really happened to your hand." Declan suddenly snapped, sitting up to face her. She froze, glancing down at her since bandaged hand. She'd told him that it was an accident and that the mirror in her bedroom fell and that she'd cut her hand while picking up the glass.

"What do you mean?" Her hand was nearly healed now but she still remembered that night as clear as day. She hadn't even told Hotch about it although he knew it wasn't an accident either.

"It wasn't an accident." Declan said, reaching out to grab her good hand. "I know I'm sixteen and don't know much but you don't have to lie to me." She met his eyes, the piercing blue demanding the truth. She reached out to hug him.

"I know, I know." She whispered to him as she held him tight. The boy was smart for his age and all she wanted was for him to be happy. She'd just had a moment the other night, the trigger was clear to her and she didn't know how to get around it. She just needed to let her walls down, but she didn't know if she was strong enough to break them down before Hotch left her for good. Maybe that was something and she and Sonja had in common, they were both just trying to protect their hearts.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: This chapter contains one scene of physical abuse. **

* * *

Emily nearly invited Hotch to lunch with her mother but didn't want to pull him away from work. Declan still wasn't in the best mood that morning and headed to school without even having breakfast. She felt for him but was there really anything she could do? She sighed before asking if Elizabeth Prentiss was already there, she was of course and Emily took the seat across from her.

"Hello, Emily" She said before sipping at her drink.

"Hello, mother" Emily repeated in the same tone. Emily ordered a soda and was quick to ask her mother's motive. She didn't beat around the bush and told her that she had a reason for calling. Emily didn't hate her mother but she wasn't about to trust her either. She hadn't even seen in her person in nearly 7 years. She wasn't even sure if she knew about her "death" to be completely honest.

"What's this about; I've only got an hour." Emily said as she glanced at her watch. She probably wouldn't even have time to eat if she wanted to make back to work on time.

"It's about your father." Emily nearly stood up but curiosity kept her grounded to her chair. She hadn't spoken to her father since she was fourteen. And the gifts stopped right after she left for Yale. Her mother hated her father, so why would she have spoken with him?

"What about him?" Emily retorted.

"He's in town, wants to see you."

"And he called you?" Emily asked, skeptical about that. Her father cheated on her mother and then ran away with the other woman. A woman scorned doesn't forget and forgive so easily. But this was her mother.

"Yes, it was brief but he wants you to call him." Elizabeth pulled out a piece of paper with a number scrawled across it. Surprisingly, she found herself taking it before getting up.

"I've gotta get back to work. Call me when you want to talk about my son or my new job." Emily muttered before heading back to work. Her mother looked stunned but didn't say anything as Emily left. Emily didn't take her father's number out of her purse but didn't throw it away. She had no idea what she was going to do with it but she found herself burying her worries in her work until her boss finally told her to go home.

When she got home Declan was playing the piano, it was a sad piece but at least he was playing. Which he hadn't since Sonja had taken off the other day. She ordered a pizza; prime comfort food before he asked if Declan wanted to watch a movie with her. He agreed on the first Indiana Jones movie as they sat and ate pizza.

* * *

Sonja looked over at her phone which refused to stop reminding her she had a text. She was lying on her bed, staring up at the stark white ceiling. What was she supposed to say to him? She asked herself. She didn't talk to him at school today; she even skipped the class they had together.

"Monica!" He father bellowed as she squeezed her eyes shut, wishing her father was out. She heard a few crashes in the other room and correctly deduced that her father was high on something. Monique was her mother's name. She'd been gone for nearly three years. She never even said goodbye to her, she just woke up one day and she was gone. That was when her father really got bad. He got high more frequently as of late and he usually didn't even notice her being out of the house most of the time. She preferred to be with Declan anyway. He made her feel safe. She hugged her pillow, wishing he could just take her away.

"Monica!" Her father yelled before he swung her door open. Sonja jumped to her feet, unsure of what to do. She didn't have a chance to do anything before he was gripping her arms and slamming her back against the nearest wall.

"How dare you leave me!" He screamed at her, slamming her against the wall again. She gasped out as the wind was knocked out of her. Sonja's mind was racing and a pounding headache was nearly making it hard to form coherent thoughts.

"It's Sonja! It's your daughter!" She yelled, tears stinging her eyes as her father looked at her skeptically. He gripped her arms a little tighter, making her gasp out before he let her go, letting her fall to the floor. A few tears streaked down her face before her father slammed the door behind him. She wiped her eyes, grabbing her phone to read Declan's messages.

"Are you alright? Please tell me what happened."

"I'm really sorry for whatever I did. Please talk to me."

"I'm getting worried. I hope you're okay."

"Sonja, I'm sorry."

Sonja put a hand to her mouth before she took a few deep breaths. She hadn't known how long she'd sat there in stunned silence, but the apartment had fallen quit so she assumed her father had crashed and gone to bed.

"Declan, I'm so sorry for taking off like that. It wasn't fair to you. I'm okay, I'm sorry I worried you." She sent quickly, moving to her bed. It was only 7 o'clock.

"Don't apologize, Sonja. I'm just glad you're not mad at me. Do you wanna come over? Pizza's still warm."

"Okay, I'll walk over in a few." Sonja pulled on a hoodie and ran out the door. When Declan opened the door she practically threw her arms around his neck. He wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I love you." She whispered into his shoulder, just loud enough for him to hear.

"Hey!" Emily greeted as she walked into the living room to find the two hugging teens. They separated and Sonja was quick to walk over and hug Emily as well. "Missed us too much?" Emily asked as Sonja smiled brightly. "There's pizza on the counter and three more Indiana movies if you're staying." Emily said, hoping she was.

"Oh, you know I am." Sonja said before Declan was grabbing her a slice.


	9. Chapter 9

It was weeks before Emily called the number her mother had given her. She hadn't seen her father since she was fourteen. That was back when they were living in Italy. She didn't think her mother knew about her father's affairs but she remembered him getting home late at night. One night she went down to see him and when she did she saw him kissing a woman. And the woman was not her mother. She'd run back upstairs that night and never mentioned it to anyone.

She'd called and scheduled dinner for Friday night. He'd gushed about being so excited to see her. She'd gone along with it, wondering just what her father could want. She thought of the possibility that he wasn't like her mother but it was hard considering she hadn't seen him in over twenty years.

She asked Hotch to come with her and Declan offered to watch Jack while they were out. Declan sat Jack down with him at the piano seat and was trying to teach him a few simple songs. Hotch and Emily said their goodbyes before they headed out. Hotch could sense Emily unease as soon as they left the house and told her that she'd just have to say the word and they would leave.

Emily stuck close to Hotch's side as she scanned the restaurant for her estranged father. Not seeing anyone who matched the picture in her head, she asked the hostess if a Richard Prentiss was already here. She nodded and showed them to a booth at the back corner of the restaurant.

"Emily!" Her father exclaimed after recognizing his only daughter and throwing his arms around her. She immediately smelled alcohol radiating off him and nearly scoffed in disgust before he was pulling away to look her up and down. Hotch introduced himself as a friend before all three sat down in the small booth.

"So, how's the FBI treating a pretty girl like you, Emmy?" Emily cringed at the things she picked out about that sentence. She knew this had been a bad idea but she thought that maybe he would have changed drastically over the years of separation. She was wrong. And she despised that nickname. The smug smile on her father's face practically made her want to punch it off. He never approved of her choice of career. He thought she was too shy and sensitive to make it in a testosterone filled work environment. Thinking of how she was when she was fourteen, she didn't blame him for thinking that back then, but if was still thinking that she was getting pushed around because she was a woman in the bureau was not going to fly tonight.

"The bureau's treating me just fine." She said flatly before the server asked for their drink orders and cut off anything her father was about to say. She watched Hotch out of the corner of her eye and knew that he could see how uncomfortable she was becoming.

"Ah, good for you" Her father quipped before taking another swig of his beer. "What about your love life? Hope you haven't found any more John Cooley's." Her father laughed and she nearly stood up from the table but kept her composure in check with a few deep breaths. Both her parents disliked her relationship with both John Cooley and Matthew Benton and it was the one thing that she truly disliked about her parents other than their controlling nature and their inability to care about mundane things that their only daughter accomplished.

"No, I haven't found anyone." She said quickly before the waitress came over with their drinks and asked if they were ready to order. Emily was really regretting her decision to come at all and told the waitress they'd need a few minutes. She walked away with a smile before Emily stood up as well.

"You know what," She nearly laughed, "I came here tonight because I really thought that after thirty years you would have changed." Hotch had stood up too as they both exited the booth. Richard Prentiss looked extremely confused before Emily continued. "You are still the same pathetic man who didn't think I could do the things I wanted to do. The same man who abandoned his family and sent gifts to his only daughter, thinking it would make it all better. You're still the judgemental asshole that I tried for years to push out of my head because I wished and wished that you could be different." She noticed her voice rising and huffed out a breath.

"I never want to see you again." Were the last words Emily Prentiss said before she turned to walk out of the restaurant, confused as to why her eyes were filling up with tears as her father yelled out her name behind her back. Hotch didn't say a word before he was driving her home.

Emily flicked on the light in the quiet house before Hotch followed her upstairs. Declan's door was open and she saw that he'd pulled out the air mattress for Jack to sleep on. She smiled a little at the scene before walking to her own room and sitting on the edge of the bed, her face in her hands.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hotch asked, walking over to sit next to her. She nodded.

"I should have known that people don't change." Emily muttered under her breath.

"Was he always such an asshole?" Hotch asked dryly as Emily chuckled.

"I guess he was but I just never wanted to believe it. I guess when he left I just wanted to remember only the good qualities about him but seeing him again and just listening to what came out of his mouth just made me remember who he really is." Emily sighed. "I don't remember my family ever being happy. We were always dysfunctional." Hotch put his hand over one of hers as she continued. He knew that the things coming out of her mouth weren't things that many people knew. "I strived so hard to get good grades and to be the perfect daughter but I was never good enough. My mother had a comment to add to everything I did and my father just sent me off with nothing but a pat on the head." She glanced up at Hotch to gage for a reaction but he just sat there, listening.

"I never felt worthy, so I resorted to self-harm, drinking, drugs; anything that could let me forget what a failure I thought I was. It wasn't until I met Matthew and John in high school that I ever felt like I had a real family. They were the people that really cared for me and wanted to help me and I could never thank them enough for it." She shook her head. "But after my abortion things were so different and I didn't even have time to fix things before my mother was uprooting me to take me back to the states with her." Emily took in a breath, remembering that she'd never even told Hotch about her abortion.

She stared into his unreadable dark eyes before he leaned down to kiss her softly. It wasn't insinuating to anything else, it was just a simple kiss that reminded her that the world wasn't falling apart around her. Once Hotch pulled away she smiled before getting up to put something a little more comfortable on. He'd settled on just stripping down to his boxers and undershirt before Emily walked back in. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she was wearing a shirt big enough to fit two of her. She went to turn off the light before they both crawled into bed together, neither saying a word before Hotch wrapped his arms around her, spooning her as his lips brushed against her hair.


	10. Chapter 10

Emily furrowed her eyebrows once she woke up and unconsciously reached for the other side of the bed, quick to realize she was only touching bare sheets. She opened her eyes to be sure of that fact before she pulled herself out of bed, wondering if it had all been a dream. She was rubbing at her eyes as she continued down the hall before hearing an unfamiliar sound from her living room as she started down the stairs.

Once she reached the bottom of the staircase she immediately matched the sound to the four individuals in her living room. They were all sitting around, playing a board game and she had to wonder what time it was.

"Morning!" Declan greeted before she draped herself over the back of the couch, her arms on either side of Hotch's head.

"Good morning," Emily smiled before she gave Hotch a quick peck on the lips.

"Aw!" Sonja let out, as Declan and Jack averted their eyes. Emily could only smile before she glanced up at the clock and realized how long she'd slept in.

"Did you guys have breakfast?" Emily asked.

"We were waiting for you. Hotch said we should let you sleep in a bit." Declan said, before suggesting the pancake house that served breakfast all day. Sonja nearly rolled her eyes at Declan's love of pancakes before Emily went to get ready so they could all go.

* * *

"Hey, isn't there a new Kate Beckinsale movie out?" Sonja asked, practically laying over Declan on the couch.

"Yeah, do you wanna go?" Declan asked before the girl in his lap was smiling up at him.

"Is that even a question?" Sonja quipped before she was getting up off him. They'd hung out with Jack for a bit before Hotch and Emily decided to take him to the zoo that afternoon. They'd gotten home in time for supper and afterwards Emily had opted to continue with Jack's piano lessons.

Emily made a face when Declan interrupted her lesson in order to ask and smiled once Hotch offered to drive them to the movies.

"See you later." Declan said, ruffling Jack's hair before he walked over to where Sonja was pulling on her boots. She waved over to Emily and Jack before running out of the house and calling shotgun. Declan just rolled his eyes before he crawled into the backseat and closed the door.

"What movie are you going to go see?" Hotch asked as he pulled out of the driveway.

"Total Recall" Declan answered.

"They remade that?"

"You sound disappointed." Sonja pointed out.

"_You can't beat the Schwarzenegger." _Hotch said in his best Arnold Schwarzenegger impression. Both teenagers clapped.

"Your voice talents are wasted in the FBI!" Sonja joked as they hit a red light.

"_You think so?"_ Hotch continued in his Schwarzenegger voice.

"Okay, now you're starting to freak me out." Declan laughed just as they started into the intersection. Sonja spun her head towards her window once a blaring horn pierced the air.


	11. Chapter 11

Declan nearly jumped up when the doctor walked into where they were asked to wait. The doctor's face looked solemn and Declan inwardly panicked as Emily put a reassuring hand on his knee.

"Can I speak with you two alone?" The doctor asked, looking towards Hotch and Emily.

"If it's about Sonja, I'm not leaving." Declan said firmly. Jack would have been asked to leave as well but he was nearly falling asleep so Hotch called Jessica to come and get him. The doctor looked to Emily who nodded her head.

"Well, good news is that it was just a minor concussion that caused the loss of conscience, she should make a full recovery." Declan found himself smiling before he realized that there must also be bad news. The doctor cleared his throat.

"I also found layered bruises covering the girl's forearms along with healing bruised ribs." The doctor started. "I pulled the medical records of Sonja Morgan and found that her mother, Monica was checked in periodically up until three years ago with broken bones that she couldn't explain." The alarms were already screaming in Emily's head as the pieces all fell into place.

"Can I see her?" Declan asked, his voice timid before the doctor nodded and let him into the room.

Once the door closed behind Declan the doctor turned to Emily and Hotch. Emily had one hand over her mouth as Hotch rubbed her back in small circles.

"Hey," Sonja said once Declan sat next to her hospital bed, giving him a small smile as he clutched her hand.

"Hey," Declan said, a bit of his composure lost as Sonja furrowed her eyebrows and tugged on his hand.

"What's wrong?" She asked quietly, lifting her head from the pillow a bit. Declan met her eyes for a long moment, squeezing her hand as he tried to find the words to say. Sonja sat herself up with a bit of effort before she asked him again.

"You could have told me." He said, wiping at his eyes.

"Oh, Dec…" Sonja whispered before Declan hugged her tight, quietly sobbing as she held him. She closed her eyes and shushed him, feeling terrible because it was her fault he felt like this. "Don't cry," She whispered, holding him a little tighter as a few tears fell down her cheeks.

There were times she wanted to tell him but she could just never find the words. He had his own problems; she didn't want to worry him with hers. She didn't want to bother others with her problems because she felt that she should be able to take care of herself. Or at least, that's what she convinced herself.

She knew that she couldn't get herself out of an abusive situation by herself. She convinced herself that other people had it worse and that she didn't deserve anyone to come save her. As much as she hated her father, she didn't want to lose him, especially since she'd already lost her mother. She didn't want to end up in the system, maybe find herself in an even worst situation than the one she'd left.

She finally pulled away from Declan to wipe his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry." Sonja told him firmly, his face in her hands.

"Don't apologize," Declan said, shaking his head. "You didn't do anything wrong." She smiled a little at him before she laid her head back down on the pillow, reaching out to hold his hand.

"You'll stay here, right?" She whispered, her eyes already closing.

"Always" Declan replied, squeezing her hand.

* * *

"So what happens now?" Emily asked impatiently.

"We call in child protective services and they'll conduct interviews before the police come into play." The doctor explained before he abruptly left the room. Emily let out a long sigh before turning to look at Hotch.

"Don't start." Hotch said before she could say anything. She nearly smiled before she leaned her head on his shoulder. She knew that she couldn't blame herself because there was no way she had proof that Sonja was in danger. She only knew that the girl didn't like her father. She assumed that even Declan didn't know either considering his earlier reactions to the news.

And it wasn't like hating your father was uncommon. The long sleeves and bracelets on the other hand were something she'd tried when she'd first starting cutting, but with a mother is constantly looking over what you wear, her wrists were no longer an option. She knew what a parent leaving felt like, it crushed you emotionally to know that you weren't good enough for one of the people who brought you into the world. You find yourself wondering what was so wrong with you. You find yourself wondering if you're worthy of any sort of love, from anyone.

It didn't take long for child protective services worker to make an appearance and quickly walked over and shook Emily and Hotch's hands before they explained their relationship to the child in question. Once they did the older women gave them a look and asked them to explain why the child was in their care and why the child was admitted to the hospital. It turned into their own personal interview before the woman asked where Sonja's legal guardian was.

"I've never met him; you'll have to ask her." Emily answered truthfully, nodding towards Sonja's hospital room. The worker, Janus, stood up and nodded towards the couple before she headed into the hospital room, Declan immediately went into protective mode before Janus held her hand out for him to shake and introduced herself. Sonja slowly opened her eyes and asked who was in the room before she pulled herself up to see.

"Hello, Sonja." Janus said as nicely as she could as Sonja made a face and didn't shake her hand. Janus pulled her hand back. "I'm here to conduct an interview about your situation." She stopped to glance at Declan who was holding Sonja's hand. "I'd prefer to do it alone." Janus said politely, before Sonja gave Declan a small nod. Only then did he kiss her hand, tell her he'd be right outside, and leave them alone.

"Hey," Emily said, getting up to pull the boy into a hug. She didn't say anything, just held him for a minute. She knew it must have been hard for him, which she is why she swore she felt her heart break a bit when she pulled away and he managed a smile. She chewed her bottom lip, wondering how many times it was so obvious that her smile was faked.

She offered him her seat which he took graciously as they all waited for Janus for come back into the room. They all sat quietly, tapping their feet and glancing at the clock. Emily had even begun to pick at her nails. Declan and Hotch both gave her a nearly identical look. She was just about to say something before Janus walked back in and closed the door behind her.

She was quick to leave the room without a word to call someone. They all stayed quiet and waited until she came back in and explained that she had called in a report to child protective services and they were going to send a police officer down for when they call in Sonja's father.

Sonja's father seemed confused as to why he was there and Emily was quick to realize he was high on something. Both her and Hotch had seen enough drugs in their work to know. Emily stood up and Hotch was up right after her, wrapping two arms around her waist and explaining that the police were there for a reason. Emily continued to stand, staring out at the scene unfolding in the near empty hallway. Emily couldn't hear what was going on but could see it all through the windows in the door as the police searched him and asked questions that he was unable to answer.

Emily couldn't stand anyone that would abuse a child and she knew if she had to watch as Sonja's dad walk away scot free she knew that not even Hotch would have been able to stop her. So when she watched as he was hand cuffed and escorted out of the building she felt a rush of relief well up in her before she turned to hug Hotch and go tell Dec the news. Sonja was sitting up and laughing when she walked in which she took as a good sign before she delivered the news.

Once she did she didn't think Sonja knew what to feel about the situation. Emily gave Declan a look before he quietly left the room. Emily sat where he did, looking at a very scared and very confused little girl. She was only sixteen; she didn't deserve any of this. She deserved to be able to go and have fun, make a few mistakes and live a life where she could go home to someone that treated her right. To someone that loved her.

Maybe Sonja's father did love her. Maybe Emily's father's heart was in the right place. Maybe they would both be left questioning at the end of the day. Sonja's father had a problem, an addiction which only amplified whatever anger issues he had. Sonja's father had a problem that he wasn't able to fix, just like Declan's father did.

"How are you doing, kiddo?" Emily asked, giving the girl a smile. She looked tired and had gauze over the wound on her forehead, but otherwise she looking like the Sonja that Emily saw almost every day. The same girl who sat around with that magically dazed look when Declan played the piano and the same girl who liked to help her cook dinner.

"I'm alright," She said, showing her as much of a real smile as she could manage.

"No, you're not." Emily said simply, watching Sonja's smile slowly fade. "But you're gonna be." Emily added. "Because you've got me, you've got Declan, you've got a family." Emily squeezed the girl's hand and watched her green eyes shine with tears.

"It's been a while since I've had a family." Sonja choked out with the smallest of smiles.

"I'm gonna make sure that you don't become a ward of the state. But I'm gonna need your help."

"Whatever you need," Sonja replied quickly.

"Do you know of any family in the DC area?" Emily asked, watching Sonja bite her lip and think for a few minutes.

"No, not that I know of," She said with a sigh. "I don't know where my mother is right now, but she was from Chicago." Sonja pulled up the picture of her mother in her head, wondering what she'd done to disappoint her. Her mother had a beautiful ebony complexion that Sonja didn't inherent. Her eyes were also from her dad, but her mother did have long light brown hair like hers. Right after her mom left her dad told her she had her mother's laugh and since then Sonja never laughed in the house. It was months before her father had started to abuse her. At first he was just sad, all the time, but once that sadness transformed into anger she knew that things would never be the same. "I don't know if some things my mother said were true or not but she once said she had a cousin in the FBI. That he was gonna come and get us out of that house. I didn't believe her because he never showed." Sonja said, a few tears sliding down her cheeks at the memories that flood into her head. She remembered when she was little, when her parents would start to argue, she would wait by the door and wish that someone would come crashing through it to take her away.

"I'll find someone. I promise." Emily said, kissing the girl's forehead before she realized how late it was. "But for right now, I should be heading home. I'll see you in the morning, sweetie." Emily said as Sonja waved goodbye.

"I'm staying here." Declan said right when Emily walked over.

"I know," Emily pulled him into a hug before she told him that she'd be here tomorrow morning. They said their goodbyes before Declan wandered back into the hospital room. Sonja was already lying down, her eyes closed as Declan sat on the other bed. She opened her eyes just long enough to see him.

"Come here," She asked and he didn't hesitate as he climbed into the bed with her. She rested her head on his chest and they just laid there in silence until they both fell asleep.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Sorry it took so long. Hopefully this obligatory smut chapter will make it up to you?**

* * *

Hotch didn't say anything when he walked back into Emily's bedroom and found her crying with her knees up to her chest. She was quiet on the ride home and he'd just gone to the bathroom before he'd come in and found her. He slowly walked over and sat next to her, running a hand through her dark hair.

"Emily…" He whispered before she quickly looked up at him and wiped her tears away.

"Why didn't you ever come over?" Emily asked as Hotch furrowed his eyebrows. "You called but you never came over. You never pressed to get in touch with me for two years." Emily spat, suddenly pushing away from him.

"I did come over." Hotch told her firmly as she eyed him. "The day after Beth left," He confessed. "I wanted to know why you'd kicked me out of your life but you and Declan must have been out because no one answered the door. I kept calling after that and then one day I realized that you were never going to pick up." Hotch looked over at her, meeting her dark eyes and knowing that in her heart that she wanted to pick up that phone.

"I just thought that Beth didn't want me around." Emily mumbled out quickly, nearly inaudible.

"Why would you think that?" Hotch asked.

"The call you got at dinner that night."

"Oh, Em, that was never about you. I was in a foul mood because of a fight me and Beth had gotten in earlier that day. It was never about you, Beth liked having you around." Hotch confided.

"Then why did you let her go?" Emily snapped, angry at the fact that Hotch let her get away. Hotch stayed quiet for what seemed like forever but in reality it was only a few minutes.

"Because you were always there, even when you weren't physically. I didn't think you knew how important you were to me; I was always wondering about how you were and worrying about how you were coping. I couldn't forget you, trust me, I tried once I gave up on the phone calls." Hotch gave her a small smile.

"It was only after I let Beth go that I realized that I loved you. I realized that I've always loved you."

Emily shook her head and looked down at her comforter as she clutched the material in her hands. Hotch was confused as to her reaction, wondering if she was about to kick him out of her house before two hands were on his face and her lips were pressed firmly against his.

"I love you too," She breathed between them, feeling the power of the words as the blood raced through her. They weren't words Emily Prentiss didn't throw around often because Emily Prentiss wasn't the kind of person to let people in. But she'd admitted to Hotch that she'd loved him because she knew that he was already in. He already saw right through her mask because at the end of the day, he wore the same one.

Hotch didn't even have time to respond to her words before he was responding to her body. Her lips seemed intent on devouring him as they both fell back on the bed with her body flush against his as they both realized what was about to happen. Emily was quick to think of her scars as soon as she'd started the tryst but continually told the voice in her head to shut up before she was pulling off Hotch's shirt.

That was when it truly hit her. She stopped and sat atop him as she ran her delicate fingers across the white scars on his chest.

"You're beautiful," She breathed before she let him slowly unbutton her shirt and push it off her shoulders. She felt tears welling in her eyes as he traced his fingers over the branding scar. He gripped her legs to keep her on his lap while he pulled her close to kiss the raised skin just above her lace covered breasts.

"I could say the same." Hotch mumbled against the flush of her skin before he flipped them so that he was hovering over her. His mouth only left her for a moment before he nipped across the outline of her bra and he reached behind her to remove the barrier between his mouth and her heaving chest. Her pupils were dilated as Hotch lowered his mouth onto her, roughly sucking at a rucked nipple as she arched her back up towards him. He stopped to flick his tongue over the hardened nub, spending a flare of sensation between her legs before he was hooking his thumbs into her now unbuckled pants and tugging them off her hips and down her endlessly long legs.

His mouth found hers again as his fingers playfully skimmed over her folds. She let out a small whimper before she pulled away from the kiss to nip at his ear.

"Fuck me, Aaron." She said in a lust filled haze, needing him to pound her over the edge of oblivion so badly that she thought she was going to implode. His slacks and boxers and her panties were gone in a flash before she was digging her heels into the back of his thighs, his cock nestled at her wet entrance.

He captured her lips in the same instant he thrust his hips forward and was consumed by the tight heat that enveloped him. He groaned out her name between feverish kisses as he began the pleasurable drive of his cock in and out of her as she gripped on to him for dear life.

"Harder…" She let out, her face contorting in ecstasy as her pussy began to clench around him. She was so close she could practically taste it as he increased the rough push and pull of his hips. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room before Hotch hiked Emily's legs higher, letting him push in deeper as she cried out at the slightly altered position.

"Come on, baby." Hotch whispered huskily, not knowing how much longer he could last as he felt the resounding slap of his balls against her ass. "Let go." He begged, biting down on her ear before he felt her fall apart around him. He groaned in satisfaction as her pussy convulsed around him, slamming in one more time before he reached the edge and pumped his essence into her svelte body.

He pulled out of her slowly, suddenly aware that in the passion of the moment they hadn't even thought of a condom. Emily was spent and half asleep as she curled her naked body against his. He wouldn't have even known if she'd heard his concern if she hadn't mumbled out that she didn't care before she was dead asleep in his arms.


	13. Chapter 13

"It's gonna scar!" Sonja argued as Declan examined her forehead in the living room.

"No, it's not." Declan nearly laughed as he looked at her head wound that had healed slowly over the past four days. Sonja rolled her eyes at him before Emily walked in with a stack of files in her hand. Declan was about to say hi before she put the files down and rubbed her temples, signalling that things weren't going well. Sonja swallowed, knowing that child protective services weren't going to let her stay here indefinitely. Emily had been trying to find her mother or any relative but was still coming up empty judging by her demeanor. Emily only came in the make coffee and only said hi before she migrated back upstairs to continue her investigation.

Declan rubbed Sonja's arm and once he realized that wasn't going to work he walked over to sit at the piano.

"You know, you can't just play me a song whenever I'm down. There aren't pianos everywhere." Sonja told him, raising an eyebrow before he grabbed her hand and pulled her over to sit down next to him. She let out a quiet laugh before he started to play a few notes, urging her to copy him.

Emily listened to the quiet sounds of piano music as she continue to look through Sonja's family photos and checking names and current locations through old friends. Her phone rang during her search and she hit speaker.

"Anything?" Emily asked, clearly stressed.

"Hey… snappy." Penelope Garcia retorted. The tech goddess feigned offense, but understood her good friend's chilly mood.

"Sorry, PG." Emily said, continuing to look through old photographs, starting to become unsure of what she was trying to find. "Do you have anything?"

"Okay, well, Monica Morgan never had a missing person's report filed and she was pretty off the grid. And all searches stop at the state line so I decided to check in surrounding states."

"And?" Emily urged.

"Emily Prentiss, let me finish. And stop pouting." Emily realized that she was pouting and stopped.

"And I found a Monica Morgan in Pennsylvania…" Garcia took a pause and Emily could hear that tone in her voice. "She was killed in a car accident in 2012." Emily covered her eyes with one hand while she let out a sigh. This girl had been through enough and she didn't want to tell her that her mother was dead. She didn't want to be the one to add to this. She didn't want to be the reason that she ended up in foster care.

"Penelope, I need something. I need to find a stable home for this girl, okay?" Emily said, her voice getting a little strained.

"I know, I know. And we don't have a case right now so I'm going to spend every second trying to do this, Emily. Okay?"

"Okay." Emily breathed before she hung up and then she held herself up in her room. She called Hotch and asked for anything comforting or anything that would help. He told her that what she needed to do was stop hiding in the bedroom and go talk to her. So, she did, she went to talk to her.

Emily Prentiss had talked to the families before. She hadn't done it in a while but the feeling in chest was still the same. She had no trouble remembering the tightness in her throat when she tried to get the words out. Sonja wasn't devastated, or at least didn't present that way. Her mother had abandoned her and subsequently left her to face abuse, but Emily could see that profound sadness in her demeanor. Emily wondered if she'd ever look so obvious in attempts to hide her emotions. She left the room again once her phone rang again. It was Penelope.

"Ems, are you ready for this?" Was how she answered.

"Good news?" Emily asked.

"The best." Penelope returned.

* * *

"Hey!" Emily greeted before she threw her arms around her former co-worker in the doorway.

"Is that Derek?" Declan asked, just pulling out a bag of chips from the cupboard in the kitchen.

"Dec, you just ate supper!" Emily laughed.

"They're for Sonja?" Declan said, smiling.

"No, they're not." Sonja called from the living room. Declan shrugged before he went to give Derek a hug.

"Hey, kid." Derek greeted.

"Hey, Dec do you think you two could head upstairs for a bit?" Emily asked, giving Declan the face that told him that argument was unacceptable. Dec told Derek it was nice to see him before he headed into the living room and took Sonja upstairs.

"Who's that?" Sonja asked, only having met JJ and Hotch.

"That's Derek; he used to work with my mom." Declan explained before Sonja lay down across his bed and he let out a sigh.

"At the bureau?" She asked.

"Uh huh, now are you going to make room for me?" Declan asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You have a chair." Sonja giggled before he made a face and began tickling her sides. "Hey!" She let out between giggles, slapping his hands away before she'd shifted enough so that Declan could lie down beside her. Sonja made a bit of a face, an arm wrapped around her midriff before she smiled at him.

Emily looked up when she heard Sonja's laughter practically bounce off the walls, making her smile before she finished pouring Derek a glass of water and sitting down next to him on the couch.

"So, why did you want me over, Em?" Derek asked as he took the glass from her.

"I can't just ask a good friend over?" Emily quipped back before Derek gave her a look. Emily sighed and put her glass down and told him the news; the news that she forced his best friend to withhold from him. She watched his expression change from shock, confusion and then it became unreadable. Emily didn't want to place this burden onto him if he didn't want to shoulder it. She didn't want to force him to do anything, but then he asked:

"Can I meet her?"

Emily smiled and called upstairs for both of them to come down.

"What is it?" Declan said with a mouthful of chips before Sonja hit his arm for talking with his mouth full.

"Derek wanted to meet Sonja." Emily said as she noticed the slight unease in the brunette's demeanor.

"Nice to meet you, sweetheart" Derek said, the normal charm working on the girl as she forced back a smile.

"You too" She replied before she sat down on the nearest chair while Declan sat on the armrest.

"Well, the reason I called you down here is because Derek is Sonja's cousin, who is willing to take her in if it's okay with her." Emily said, as Sonja's facial expression went from surprised to thoughtful and from thoughtful to happy.

"And I could still live here and stay at the same school?" Sonja asked.

"That's right. Hope you like dogs though." Derek said, smiling at her as she met his eye.

"I love dogs." She smiled back.

"Well since tomorrow's my day off maybe you could come over and see my place before you make your decision?" Derek suggested. Sonja stayed still and quiet for a moment before agreeing to this plan. Derek left a little while later. They all just talked in the living room until Sonja let out a yawn and Emily noticed how late it was getting. With plans to come back tomorrow, Derek left with his contagious pearly while smile before Emily suggested that they all head to bed.


	14. Epilogue

"Sonja, right?" Reid asked as he extended a hand. "Greek word for wisdom," Reid was the last person on the BAU team she'd yet to introduce herself too. Derek warned her he might ramble off some facts when they met. Sonja was genuinely amused as she shook his hand.

"Pretty boy, I see you've met mini-me." Derek said with a smile, draping his arm around the younger man's shoulders. Sonja grinned before Derek told her to stop introducing herself and go get something to eat. She told Reid it was nice to meet him before she headed into JJ and Will's kitchen.

Penelope was the only one still in the kitchen and immediately served her before she could object. She thanked her as Penelope's happiness radiated off of her pink hair streaks. Sonja didn't think she would have ever met such a fantastic bunch of people in one place as she went out on the back deck to join the others.

Declan offered the space next to him and she gladly accepted before she bit into her hamburger, ketchup dribbling down her chin. Declan barely stifled a laugh before she wiped it off. Morgan and Reid come outside and joined everyone a few minutes later.

"Sonja" Henry asked, drawling out her name. "Can I sit with you?" Sonja smiled and reached her arms out to pull the boy into her lap. Declan was glancing around and Sonja noticed that Emily and Hotch were nowhere to be seen.

"They're probably just inside." Sonja said, and as if on cue, the couple emerged from the patio door. "See." Sonja noted before JJ stopped and got everyone's attention. Everyone turned their head and the patio went silent as Emily continued to brush her hair behind her ear. Hotch reached down to grab her hand before he announced that they had news. Declan was especially curious about this, furrowing his eyebrows as he leaned in to listen.

"I'm pregnant." Emily said finally, forcing back a smile as she waited for a reaction. There was not even a second of silence before everyone was hugging her and congratulating the two. Declan stay seated and Sonja nudged his shoulder. It was then that he ran and nearly tripped to hug his mother tightly, asking why he'd been left in the dark about this. Her and Hotch just exchanged a sly look before Sonja grabbed Henry's hand and went to congratulate Declan's parents. Emily hugged her so tight she nearly couldn't breathe but she didn't mind one bit because she knew that Emily loved her to pieces and that she was happy. Once she took a look around all she saw were smiling faces and she couldn't help but smile too. She'd always imagined having a family like this.

"Sonja," Declan asked as she hadn't noticed him come up to her. Once she clued back into reality she pulled him down for a long, searing kiss. She heard a few of the adults make some snide comments before she pulled away with a dazzling smile.

"Hey, hey, keep it PG." Morgan teased before Sonja began to laugh. It was infectious and happy and, for the moment, it washed away all the dark and haunting thoughts that filled each individual mind on that back patio. It had been years since Sonja had felt this genuinely happy, with nothing to worry her. No lingering thoughts to wear her smile down. And when she met Emily's eye she knew that she felt the same way.


End file.
